Tuesday, November 22, 2005

For the Record.

Over the past week, she has been brought up a number of times.

So, I'm going to set the record straight.

The last time I talked posted about her was the day before I gave up entirely.

She told me that I could call her. Admittedly, she didn't say anything about whether or not she would respond.

That hurt. I'm not going to lie about it. It hurt.

But that's not really the frustrating part of it all. It's difficult to not let this experience taint any other relationships with females. It's difficult to no become bitter. It's difficult to not put up and wall and decide that women aren't worth my time at all.

That's the real problem. That's the battle I'm losing.

There's part of me that wants to just dismiss it as a learning experience. That's the same part of me that wants to say "I'm better off without her." "She's not worth my time." "She lied and I don't need a girl like that."

But, the difficulty in all of it is that it sucks and I really don't understand it. I don't understand why beautiful women are regularly unable to be honest and don't seem to care if they hurt you. Effing why?

Maybe some other gorgeous women like Anne or Aimee or Chickie can fill me in on this concept/phenomenon/tendency/whatever.

That's it folks. It's over. I hope this answers any other questions. And hopefully, that's the last time I have to mention the whole flawed experience.

To those of you that offered their advice and wisdom, I thank you. It was an interesting couple of weeks.

---------------
Daily Ditty:
10 Years - Through the Iris

5 comments:

Chickie said...

I think that she did it because she knew she maybe wasn't into you as you were into her and she didn't want to hurt your feelings.

Sometimes the subtle blow-off is easier than face-to-face honesty because you don't know if the guy is going to freak out on you or not.

I have some stories illustrating this that I shall post later.

Anonymous said...

For me too it is difficult to no become bitter. However, please remember that God is in control and all things work together for good for those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. He has more in store. Please no become bitter. Be patient.

anaglyph said...

Be really careful about lumping all women in one box Joe - some are right for you, some are just not. Be patient and be yourself and one day you'll find that what you are looking for just happened and you didn't even have to try that hard.

And not wanting to sound preachy, but hey, what exactly is this 'beauty' you're talking about? There's many kinds of beautiful. 'Pretty' is one. 'Sexy' is another. But there are some kinds that are a lot less obvious, a lot more subtle, and in my opinion, they're the ones that are the jewels.

(WVS on this comment - 'slukfisz' No idea what that is but it sounds totally obscene)

Anonymous said...

Dating is hard, Joe, and everyone does the best they can. I don't know anyone who's ever set out to deliberately hurt people. The girl was probably feeling awkward and didn't know what to say or do.

It hurts, yes, but there's no reason to become bitter. Bitterness doesn't help, it makes you feel worse, not better, and on some level I think it's morally not right.

That said, I still think you're an excellent catch. Keep going. You're going to make the right girl very happy some day.

Alex said...

Aww. *hugs*
I'm with Chickie. This kind of stuff can be incredibly hard. I'd been dating someone once who was really into me, but I didn't feel the same way. I got incredibly messed up about it because I wasn't really attracted to him but I really liked him.

He spoiled that, of course, when he continued to hit on me, even when I was extremely sick and wanted to be left alone, until I told him I never wanted to see him again and he sent me an absolutely filthy letter. (As the one and only person I've ever dated, this was kind of traumatic, actually.)

Which is, of course, another reason why she might have tried the "subtle" approach: reject a guy outright and sometimes they'll drive you crazy trying to change your mind, but if you do the "call me" approach then they're not so desperate about it.

Sorry it happened to you, though. As someone who has trouble with social skills and relationships, I can see that it would be immensely frustrating.